Getting Summer Started with Your Kids May 14, 2008

Even though my children are only 3 years and 1 year, summer’s approach immediately triggers in my mind the childhood idyllic fantasy of *summer vacation* (the asterisks are meant to imply starry-eyed wistfulness. Yeah, bear with me.) While enjoying a day at the beach with my dear, very pregnant friend Vicki and her 2-year-old, Kailin, we decided the kids were old enough for a backyard campout. We must be some kind of child-entertainment geniuses, because I just received an email from party-planner-extraordinaire Lisa Kothari, (author of Dear Peppers and Pollywogs… What Parents Want to Know About Planning Their Kids’ Parties) assuring me that such an event will “turn a hum-drum night into a night of spectacular fun.” OK, I’m sold!  

According to her book, she recommends:
Let the kids sleep outdoors in a tent overnight. Play flashlight tag, get a telescope and gaze at the stars, make tie-dyed t-shirts, or blow bubbles and shine your flashlights on them.
Do we still get points if our husbands do the actual outdoor sleeping alongside our little ones? The woman is due in July, after all. She can’t be expected to fit in a sleeping bag, much less have to traipse inside 8 times a night to pee. 

I like this next tip from Kothari; My kid gets to play with dirt, and I get homegrown strawberries in a few months. Win-win.
Have fun with strawberries. Buy mini strawberry seeds and little terracotta pots. Have the kids decorate the pots and then plant the seeds. For a strawberry relay race, put strawberries on spoons and have the kids race up and down a relay path. For drinks,
freeze strawberries in the ice cubes.

You can find more in her new book or online at www.pepperspollywogs.com

Managing Your Child’s Hay Fever - Naturally May 1, 2008

So your child doesn’t have a fever, and the closest she’s come to hay was at a petting zoo last Fall, but thanks to the Springtime return of the misnomer, hay fever (allergic rhinitis), she’s sneezing, and itching her runny nose and puffy eyes. 

Hay fever allergens are airborne substances (such as pollen, dust, animal hairs, and environmental pollutants) that enter the mouth, nose, throat, and lungs. To protect us from the perceived allergen, our immune system reacts—the body releases large numbers of antibodies called immunoglobulin E (IgE) to resist it. This IgE then releases certain chemicals like histamine, to flush the pollen out of the airways, causing swelling and irritation in the eyes and nose. While hay fever and Spring seem to go hand-in-hand, commonly affecting kids and teens, allergic rhinitis can occur throughout the year in the under-five set.
Here are the recognizable symptoms:

• Runny nose, nasal congestion
• Sneezing
• Watery eyes
• Itchy, watery eyes, nose or throat
• Coughing
• Postnasal drip
• Fatigue
• Facial pressure or pain

Let’s take a look at natural remedies for managing Hay Fever:

Vitamin C helps reduce the release of excess histamine and supports the immune system. In a study by scientists at the Arizona State University, researchers found that histamine levels had dropped by 40% when they administered increasing amounts of vitamin C from 500-2000mg over 6 weeks.  Participants were adults. For children, increase intake to at least 500-1000mg per day. (Gummy-bear vitamin C is rarely turned down.)

Bioflavonoids are what give fruits and vegetables their rich colors. They are synergistic with vitamin C, which means if you use the two together, you will get even more benefit. Experts agree that the best bioflavonoid for hay fever is quercetin, a natural antihistamine. Quercetin reduces inflammation of the nasal passages, the bronchial airways, and throat. It is found naturally in apples (with the skin on), berries, red grapes and red onion, but to be certain your child is getting an adequate amount, try a tincture that can be added to a vitamin C-fortified juice.

Try toasting your good health at a tea party with your child. Naturopaths recommend a daily teaspoon of freshly-produced, unfiltered honey dissolved in warm water to help keep hay fever symptoms at bay. Naturopaths say this works like a vaccine, delivering a tiny dose of local pollen, which is usually the main trigger for an attack. This tiny daily dose then helps the body build resistance so that when hay fever season arrives and pollen is everywhere, the body is already protected. (Clinical studies have not provided any evidence for this belief. Nor are there studies to prove that squeezing a honey-bear makes a kid feel better, but I’m willing to state that it should. On a personal note, this is the one remedy that worked for my 3-year-old, Joseph. Although his hay fever is not a particularly aggravated case, a little honey squeezed over natural yogurt once each day keeps all symptoms in check.) Also, try lemonade-as-medicine: serve honey and boiled grapefruit and lemon three times a day for your vit-y C and pollen vaccine in one re-hydrating cup. Offer it cold over ice.
(Remember, babies under age 1 should not ingest honey.)

Hay Fever and Heredity

Do you have a family history of allergic reactions or related conditions such as asthma and eczema? If this is the case, you need to focus on stabilizing the immune system. You can begin by avoiding flour, sugar, salt and dairy products for one week to see if these allergy-aggravators are linked to your child’s condition. Be sure to offer plenty of filtered water, and serve good-quality protein. 

Two cautionary notes: 1). One of the most effective natural remedies for hay fever is Stinging nettle (Urtica dioica), a plant-tasting nettle tea. Stinging nettle is a “hotbed of herbal pharmacological activity,” according to whatreallyworks.co.uk, containing both vitamins C and K, immune-boosting proteins, and an anti-inflammatory agent to counter the action of the body’s histamine discharge. While there is plenty of research to support this claim, I did find instances where it was not recommended for children under ten. Similarly, some research states that pregnant women should not take it, while others said the opposite. 2.) The herb butterbur (Petasites hybridus) is being studied as a natural allergy treatment because it is thought to work in a similar way to allergy medications by blocking the action of histamine and leukotrienes, inflammatory chemicals involved in allergic reactions. It should be noted that children and pregnant women are advised to avoid butterbur. Furthermore, butterbur is in the ragweed plant family, so people who are allergic to ragweed, marigold, daisy, or chrysanthemum should not use butterbur.

For a lively and informative read on one hay-fever-sufferer’s trials with prescription meds and triumphs with homeopathic and other natural remedies, check out Colette Cope’s Natural Remedies to Fight Hay Fever here.

Choline Reduces Birth Defects, Improves Brain Development March 31, 2008

Studies show that, in pregnancy, choline plays a critical role in brain development, and may reduce the risk of neural-tube defects such as spina bifida by as much as fifty percent.

Dr. Gary Shaw, a research director of the California Birth Defects Monitoring Program reported in a paper in the American Journal of Epidemiology (2004), that women whose daily choline intake was greater than 498mg had about half the risk of delivering a baby with a neural-tube defect, compared with expectant mothers whose choline intake was 290mg or less. Surprisingly, this reduction occurred independently of intake of folic acid. “Many of us have been targeting folic acid as the way to prevent birth defects, and this has certainly worked, ” Dr. Shaw says. ” But issues remain as to why it doesn’t work in everyone.”

In pregnancy, choline plays a critical role in brain development by helping regulate the transport of nutrients into and out of cells. It also forms acetylcholine, a neurotransmitter involved in learning and memory function, according to Dr. Steven Zeisel, a recognized expert in choline, who published his findings in the Journal of Neurochemistry (2004). Choline, a vitamin B-like compound, is found in high quantities in eggs, beef and chicken liver, wheat germ and soybeans. The National Academies of Science recommends nursing mothers increase choline intake to 550mg—the equivalence of two whole eggs.

*For more info on how choline helps during pregnancy, check Big Love, Low Risk: Your Guide to the Healthiest Pregnancy. You’ll also learn how Omega-3 fatty acids may decrease the risk of both post-partum depression and preterm labor. 

Becoming Daddy February 1, 2008

This previously published story is now available for FREE reprint.
Simply include my byline and drop me a note indicating when and where it will appear. 

You’re dutifully shopping for the seemingly endless list of baby gear, you’re attending labor and delivery classes to prepare for the big Birth Day, but has anyone prepared you for after B-Day? Chances are, in the excitement and anticipation of bringing home a new baby, no one stopped to tell you, or your partner, about the reality of after-birth.

While mommy is star of the show in the delivery room, when you arrive home with your little bundle of joy, you’ll take center stage. You’ll never be more needed or more appreciated; taking care of your partner after a birth is your shining moment to become the hero. It won’t be easy; you’ll encounter bodily fluids and trips down drug store aisles that were before unknown. But no mission was ever more rewarding or worthwhile. This is your guide to mommy-care.

Fast-forward to homecoming and what to expect.
Mission Stratagem: Every successful mission needs a well-equipped Base Camp. After hours of labor and finally delivering the baby, (or after major abdominal surgery, a.k.a.: Cesarean section,) mommy will be bedridden. Mommy is not simply resting or more comfortable lying down, she is virtually unable to do anything but lay down, outside of using the bathroom. She may not be able to walk to the bathroom, in fact, and will require help with a bedpan. She will not, under any circumstances, be able to use stairs for some time, possibly weeks. Base Camp can be either a bed or couch on the main floor of your home. You can safely lodge both mommy and baby there. Bring in her favorite music, roll in the TV. Keep her baby-care books, a camera, and a telephone within reach.

Tip: Be sure the Base Camp bed isn’t made with your best sheets. Save the fancy robes and nightgowns for when visitors come; stains are inevitable.
Reward: This will be your “island” as a new family; it will be where you spend those first, very precious days together. The hours will melt into one another, and you will share some of the most intimate moments of your life together, staring in amazement at what you’ve created.

It takes a village…
Mission Stratagem: Turn to others for help. Since you will be helping your partner with the baby, and with several health concerns, you’ll both need food and water. Call in reinforcements now. (Possible reliable sources: Grandmothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, best friends, people from church, neighbors.) You must have a freezer stocked with healthy, quick to heat and serve food. You won’t have time for cooking or cleaning the house. You may even need to spoon-feed mommy if she can’t sit up. If all else fails, begin stocking up on take-out menus. Remember, nutrition is key-think calcium, whole grains, protein, and veggies.

Mommy will be fighting dehydration. Recovery, paired with nursing, will require plenty of fluids and healthy snacks. Keep a gallon jug of purified water at Base Camp constantly. Use it to refill a sippy-cup, or plastic cup with a straw. Replenish her with real fruit juices. Orange juice is a good source of vitamin C and potassium. Supply her with protein bars, dried and fresh fruit, crackers and cheese. Remember, you are on baby-time, which means there is no difference between day and night. She will need to have water and snacks available twenty-four hours a day.
Reward: A well-nourished mommy recovers faster and produces sufficient breast milk. The arrival of your reliable sources, and their home-cooked food, is a huge blessing. They have probably been through this before and can help you with the workload of running a household. And, they will be overjoyed to see the baby so soon after the birth.

The baby will sleep. A lot.
Mission Stratagem: Let mommy get her rest as well. Join her often, rest will help you to stay healthy and alert. When you are both awake, however, you can help mommy recover from pain with massage. Her back is likely sore. This is because her abdominal muscles are not where they once were and are not supporting her back. Gently use your hands to massage her, or roll a tennis ball under your palm. If you learned positive visualization or relaxation techniques in your prenatal class, put them to use now. If she has not had a C-Section, locate the top of her uterus (fundus), and massage it until it becomes firm. You will find it just below her belly button. Do this regularly to help it to shrink, and to control bleeding. Do this before nursing to alleviate cramping. For an itchy C-Section scar, the doctor can prescribe an ointment. Extra points: Compliment her beautiful body which produced such a perfectly wonderful little person. Carrying and delivering your child is an awesome and astonishing miracle.
Reward: After nine months of pregnancy, gentle touching and stroking of your partner is the welcome first intimacy you two will share as parents. Helping her with her pains is a loving and respectful way to show your gratitude for giving you a child.

Nursing: A New Frontier.
Mission Stratagem: Your partner may choose to breastfeed. The first few days after the birth, colostrums appear before her milk comes in. She should nurse as often as the baby wishes, usually every two hours. Neither mommy nor baby will be very efficient at first, they are both beginners! She will need plenty of patience and encouragement from you, until she becomes more skilled. Mommies rarely see the colostrums and often worry the baby will starve. Assure her that baby’s tiny clenched fist is roughly the size of a newborn stomach, and soiled or wet diapers are proof positive of a well-fed infant. As her milk comes in, she may become engorged and very sore. A cold compress will provide relief, along with pumping or expressing by hand. Her hormones may also cause her body to alternate between sensations of heat or extreme cold. Bear with her, adding or removing blankets as needed. Above all else, your calm and confident demeanor will help her maintain hers. If mommy had a Cesarean, she won’t be able to lift the baby. She can nurse while lying on her side, or place the baby on a nursing pillow or rolled blanket.
Reward: Beside breastfeeding’s numerous benefits to both baby and mother, you may be thankful for avoiding the high cost of formula. Breast milk expressed with a pump will allow you the closeness she shares with baby during feedings. Babies love skin-to-skin contact. Open your shirt and snuggle your child close while giving a bottle.

When Good Intentions Go Bad.
Mission Stratagem: Family members are often eager to help with the new baby. While their help and advice is often welcome, there are times when even the most well-meaning Nana or Auntie can be the cause, rather than the dispeller of, stress.

You are in charge of this mission. Therefore, gently and tactfully redirect those who freely dispense unwanted advice to highly valued tasks, like laundry or cooking. For those who are busy in the kitchen, but whose advice is needed at Base Camp, take over the stirring of the pot and send the advisor to mommy. And, should chaos prevail, shield mommy and baby from unnecessary stress by announcing the need for quiet time. Let them know when they may come for another visit.
Reward: You are daddy, hero, protector, and knower-of-what-is-best for mommy. Let poorly-chosen comments just roll off your back; you are strong, and quite frankly, too busy and too needed to be bothered.

No longer “No Man’s Land”.
Mission Stratagem: Just when you thought you’d seen it all in the delivery room, trips to the bathroom may become your biggest challenge. Your partner probably knew that there would be blood, but even she may not be prepared for the sheer volume of it. Gently explain that it is lochia (low-key-ah), a vaginal discharge from the wound left by the placenta. It will be bright red after the birth, then darken in color, and eventually pale. Nursing, which causes the uterus to contract, may cause some bleeding.
Prepare a squeeze bottle of boiled saltwater. Your partner will use this to rinse off after using the toilet. She can use toilet paper to blot, but not rub, dry. The greatest gift you can give mommy at this point are incontinence undergarments, such as Depend®. Have a good laugh about it with your partner, then go out and get them. There is simply no better “catch-all” for her condition over the next few weeks. Keep maxi-pads, undergarments and saltwater within reach of the toilet. She must not bend at the waist, so leave them on the counter or on a shelf.

You have probably never touched a maxi-pad in your lifetime, so the next suggestion may come as a surprise. Keep in mind that your partner likely feels as though she has passed a football through her privates-something in the ballpark of having the worst kick to the groin ever known to mankind. Take half a dozen maxi-pads into the kitchen, and with a soup ladle or large spoon, carefully pour water down the middle of each, then place in the freezer in a slightly “U” shape. These frozen pads will bring great relief when secured in an incontinence undergarment. The undergarment will absorb the water as it melts.

Be the king among new daddies: draw a bath for mommy. Do not add any soaps, bubble baths or oils, just warm water. Light some candles, put on some relaxing music, and help mommy into and out of the water. Note: if mommy had a C-Section, give her a warm sponge bath.
Reward: Your support of mommy, in even these less-than-glamorous tasks, will instill trust and openness in your relationship. She will feel confident that she can come to you for most anything, and that you, above everyone else, can be trusted and relied upon through the toughest of times.

Congratulations on your upcoming move into fatherhood! The days ahead are filled with yet greater rewards.

The Shopping List
Orange juice with added vitamin C and/or calcium
Other favorite 100% real fruit juices
1 dozen protein bars
Dried and fresh fruits
Whole grain bread and crackers
Whole grain cereals and popcorn
Milk, yogurt and cheese (cow’s milk or calcium-fortified soy-based)
4-5 gallons purified water
Squeeze bottle (peri bottle)
2-3 dozen maxi-pads (sanitary napkins)
1-2 packages incontinence undergarments (e.g. Depend®)
1 sippy-cup or package of straws
If mommy plans to breastfeed: breast cream, nursing pillow, breast pump, bottles and nipples, nursing pads.

When to Call the Doctor. Call your healthcare practitioner in the event of:
Foul-smelling vaginal discharge
Localized, persistent breast pain
Chills or fever over 100.4
Heavy, bright red vaginal bleeding (saturating more than 1 pad per hour)
Pain, redness or swelling over perineum or varicose veins
C-Section incision is persistently painful, or if the area around it turns dark red, or if a brown, gray, green or yellow discharge oozes from the wound.

Big Love, Low Risk: Your Guide to the Healthiest Pregnancy December 16, 2007

This previously published story (San Diego Family magazine) is now available for FREE reprint.
Simply include my byline and drop me a note indicating when and where it will appear.

At no other time of a woman’s life is she more concerned about good nutrition and health than during pregnancy. To celebrate this sometimes scary yet exhilarating new chapter of your life, your first loving act of parenting can be to protect your developing baby by caring for yourself.

When you’re expecting, it’s natural to be concerned about your health and that of your unborn baby. Maintaining a healthful diet, lowering stress and getting appropriate exercise and rest are all important for the health of a pregnant mother and her baby. Food safety is also very important. The following will help you make safe decisions when selecting and preparing food for yourself and your family, as well as helpful tips on reducing stress and keeping fit.

The Big Three

Scientific research continues to expand our knowledge of nutrition in pregnancy. Let’s begin with the Big Three: protein, calcium and folate. Use the Big Three as building blocks for all your meals. Be sure to include them with every meal to meet recommended daily requirements.

Protein is essential to your baby’s cell growth and blood production. In general, a pregnant woman requires 80-100 grams of protein daily. The best choices for pregnant women include lean meat, poultry, eggs, beans, peanut butter and tofu.The National Institute of Health states that folate, or folic acid, protects against neural tube defects including malformations of the spine (spina bifida), skull and brain (anencephaly).

The Institute of Medicine (IOM) recommends a daily intake of 400-600 micrograms of folic acid per day from fortified foods and/or dietary supplements. The 2000 Dietary Guidelines for Americans suggest pregnant mothers enjoy green leafy vegetables, dark yellow fruits and vegetables, beans, peas and nuts. Also, check the cereal aisle at the grocery store to find ready-to-eat cereals fortified with 100 percent of the RDA for folate.

Most women are aware of calcium’s role in building and maintaining healthy bones. During pregnancy, in addition to forming your baby’s bones, the mineral helps to conduct nerve impulses and aids in the proper function of your baby’s heart and other muscles. The recommended amount of calcium for a pregnant woman is 1,200 milligrams a day–just four cups of milk a day. Other dairy products like yogurt and hard cheese make excellent choices, or you can get your calcium through nondairy products such as collards, spinach, broccoli, okra, chickpeas, lentils, sweet potatoes and tofu. Also, choose foods that are fortified with calcium: orange juice, cereal, bread and cereal bars, to name a few. Check food labels for calcium levels of 30 percent RDA to get the same amount as you would from a cup of milk.

Now that you have your building blocks for each meal, you can ensure the healthy development of your growing baby with the following nutritional powerhouses. These nutrients have undergone worldwide scientific studies and have been found to be indispensable for human growth and development.

Brainies R Us

Give your little one a jumpstart at school! Omega-3 fatty acids have proven a critical component for both neurological and early visual development of infants. Recently published research has confirmed that adding omega-3 fatty acids to the diet of a pregnant woman can positively affect her baby’s visual and cognitive function–with effects measurable up to the age of four! Omega-3 fatty acids may also have positive effects on the pregnancy itself. According to Dr. Steve Hasley, a practicing obstetrician at West Penn Hospital, women with lower intakes of omega-3 fatty acids have a much greater risk of developing pre-eclampsia (also known as toxemia), a complication affecting approximately 5-10% of all pregnancies and a leading contributor to maternal mortality, preterm delivery, fetal growth retardation and perinatal mortality. Dr. Hasley adds that an even more important benefit is the role of omega-3 fatty acids in preventing pre-term labor and delivery. Women with lower amounts of omega-3 have a higher risk of preterm labor, and supplementation with this vital nutrient has been shown to decrease the risk. Omega-3 fatty acids may also lower the risk of post-partum depression. A pregnant woman should get at least 250 mg of omega-3 fatty acids per day using vitamin supplements, fish oil capsules, ground flax seeds, flax oil or fortified cereals.

Will your baby be President one day?

By adding choline to your diet now, you improve your chances of delivering a genius! The Journal of Neurophysiology (vol 91, April issue) reported study results indicating that taking choline during pregnancy could “super-charge” children’s brains for life. Scott Swartzwelder and colleagues at Duke University Medical Center in North Carolina, US, discovered that pregnant women who took choline, a member of the vitamin B family, gave birth to faster learners with better memories. Results of the study prompted the US Institute of Medicine to add choline to its 2003 list of essential nutrients, particularly for pregnant women. Daily requirements for pregnant and lactating women are 550 milligrams, or 2 egg yolks. While choline and omega-3 fatty acids are also found in liver, swordfish and tuna, those foods should be avoided during pregnancy. Liver is high in retinal, which can cause birth defects; swordfish and tuna fish have a high mercury content, which is harmful to fetuses.

Number one on the hitlist of trouble-foods, high-mercury fish is a prenatal no-no. Mercury occurs naturally in the environment and is also released into the air through industrial pollution. It accumulates in streams and oceans where fish absorb it. Eating fish and shellfish containing higher levels of mercury may harm an unborn baby or young child’s developing nervous system. In a 2004 report, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) and the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) advised pregnant women, nursing mothers and young children to avoid shark, swordfish, king mackerel`and tilefish. For fish and seafood lovers, they suggest only 12 ounces a week of low-mercury fish and shellfish, such as cooked shrimp, canned light tuna and salmon. Be advised, albacore (”white”) tuna has more mercury than canned light tuna.

Not The Usual Suspects

As a pregnant woman, you’ve never been hungrier. Since you’re spending more time in the kitchen, here are some helpful hints on food safety.

If you’ve always nibbled the uncooked cookie dough, savored Caesar salads with raw egg in the dressing or prepared your burgers medium rare, experts say pregnancy is a time to rethink these practices.

Hormonal changes during pregnancy have an effect on the mother’s immune system that lead to an increased susceptibility to listeriosis, a type of bacteria in contaminated food. According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC), pregnant women are about 20 times more likely than other healthy adults to get listeriosis. In fact, about one-third of listeriosis cases happen during pregnancy. Listeriosis can be transmitted to the fetus through the placenta even if the mother is not showing signs of illness. This can lead to premature delivery, miscarriage, stillbirth or serious health problems for her newborn.

USDA’s Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS) and the FDA advise pregnant women to steer clear of hot dogs and luncheon or deli meats unless they are reheated until steaming hot. And, until the baby is born, wave bye-bye to soft cheeses such as feta, brie, camembert, blue-veined cheeses and Mexican-style cheeses such as queso blanco fresco. Anything labeled “unpasteurized” should be avoided, including beverages.More goodies that should never top your (whole grain, low-sodium) cracker: refrigerated pâté or meat spreads or refrigerated smoked seafood including those labeled as “nova-style,” “lox,” “kippered,” “smoked,” or “jerky.” Opt instead for hard cheeses and semi-soft cheeses such as mozzarella, pasteurized processed cheese slices and spreads. Cream cheese and cottage cheese and canned or shelf-stable pâté and meat spreads can be safely eaten.  

Take A Load Off

Pregnancy is a stressful time for many women. You may be feeling happy, sad and scared–all at the same time. As a new mommy, you are commencing a new life of love and concern for your child’s well-being. Now is the ideal time to learn how to cope with stress, while building energy and stamina through appropriate exercise. Any woman, pregnant or not, can cope better with stress if she is healthy and fit.

Speak with your doctor about which types of exercise would most benefit your unique pregnancy. Exercise keeps pregnant women fit, can prevent some common discomforts of pregnancy (e.g.: backache, fatigue and constipation) and relieves stress. Popular, safe choices for most mothers include prenatal-specific yoga, walking and swimming. A group prenatal exercise class creates a relaxed setting for meeting and talking with other expectant moms and allows temporary separation from a hectic workplace or the demands of maintaining a home.

Allow sufficient time to relax for the health of your baby and yourself. Maternal stress can affect your developing baby. Simple yet effective stress reducers include slipping into a warm (but not hot) bath, listening to quiet music or positive visualization tapes while lying on your left side, meditation, deep breathing or writing in a journal. Hormonal changes may be partly responsible for the mood swings experienced during pregnancy. These mood swings are common and normal. When possible, permit yourself to simply laugh about them. Often, after the baby is born, parents share a giggle over stumbling through mommy’s hormone-induced highs and lows together. Most importantly, attending all your prenatal care appointments will give you the reassurance that your baby is doing well and allow you to ask questions and share your feelings.

If stress is taking its toll on you, talk about your feelings with your partner, friends, relatives and health care practitioner. If you feel overwhelmed, talk with a trained counselor. New motherhood is a life-changing event. Fortunately, for today’s expectant moms, quality health information is available so that you can offer your child the best possible start in life. Change is indeed scary, but without change you wouldn’t be pregnant! Begin adjusting to your wonderful new life as mommy by making simple dietary and lifestyle adjustments that encourage a healthy, low-risk pregnancy.

Pregnancy Superfoods!

You’ll meet your recommended daily allowances in no time with these nutrient-rich food choices!

• 2 whole eggs offer 17 grams of protein and an entire day’s choline requirement.
• 1 4-ounce glass of vitamin D-fortified milk offers 8 grams of protein and 300 milligrams of calcium with vitamin D to help absorb it.
• 2 Tbsp peanut butter offers 8 grams of protein, 15 milligrams of calcium and folate.
• Green leafy veggies offer folate, fiber (to relieve constipation) and calcium.
• Read the cereal box: Many whole or multigrain cereals are fortified with omega-3-rich flax and offer up to 100 percent of the RDA for folate, not to mention protein and fiber. Pour a cup of milk over it, add a piece of fruit and you’ve made an ideal start to your day!  

Special note:
Please note that smoking, second-hand smoke and the use of alcohol and/or narcotics are extremely dangerous to your unborn baby. If you haven’t abstained from nicotine, drugs or alcohol, stop now. Get help through a local program or with the assistance of a medical professional. Also, several types of over-the-counter or prescription medications could pose a danger to your developing infant. Discuss the use of any medication with your practitioner.  

Are you selecting baby gear and decorating your nursery? Fisher Price has a chic, gender-neutral new line of baby products, The Zen Collection. Check it out here!

Noah on the Go December 14, 2007

Nana took this picture almost 2 months ago–we simply must get our most recent pictures off the camera! However, I will admit that (visually, anyway) our Noahbaby hasn’t changed much. I mean, he was already sporting the 12-month clothes when he was 5 months, and the pants are just now becoming capris as he inches towards the 8-month milestone. He is hanging in at 2 teeth, but is teething almost incessantly now. Last night, we were almost convinced he must have an ear ache, becuase he’s been so miserable the last few days and he’s been tugging at his ears. Several reliable sources  later (Dr.Greene.com, AskDrSears.com, among others), the consensus is that an infant under one year (regardless of his inherent genius!) can’t pinpoint where pain is, so pulling ears is not a clue, and that ear infections usually come right after a cold, while cold symptoms are still in play. Little Noah has not endured a single illness in his young life, so it must just be the teething.

He is now very aware of our comings and goings, and while frustrating, I am rather flattered at his concern over my disappearances when I use the bathroom or leave to get a drink. He is also waving hello to people now, with that little babyish Queen-style wave. (Really, you’d think the Queen would rethink her wave, considering it’s the hallmark of the under-one set around the world.) And speaking of hand gestures, we have been playing a lot of little hand-games (songs set to finger movements) which he can imitate with amazing accuracy. Will be a surgeon one day? Hmmm. Daddy Joseph says he will be a pianist. Well, for the next couple of decades at least, I suppose he’ll become a Wii champion. Sigh.

Noah hasn’t crawled yet, but is quite pleased with himself when he gets on all fours and does the rock-rock-rock motion. And, he loves to hold himself up. I’m so in love with him. I’m also so very thankful that little Joseph loves his brother as much as his Daddy and I do. They have always had a solid bond, but it is getting more and more fun as Joseph “talks” to Noah by imitating his sounds. It thrills Noah and is a game he can play for…minutes! (which is hours in big-people time!) Now that I think of it, I’m going to check out here what little Joseph was like at 8 months.

I do fear, however, that the glory days of breast-feeding might be coming to an end. I’m just not getting the flow I once enjoyed. I’ve been taking Organic Mother’s Milk tea with no success. I remember using a homeopathic tincture with Joseph. Aunt Shell the pharmacist sells it at her pharmacy; I’ll have to ask her. Anyway, this is just not the right time to stop nursing, for so many reasons. First, he is only now realizing separation anxiety. What is more comforting, really, than mama’s warm embrace and familiar milk? Secondly, we will be traveling to Canada over Christmas–a new environment/routine, sick people on the aircraft, a change in weather, new people holding him–he will need breatmilk’s immune-building antibodies, no? And the comfort and security?

He also has his times when he just expects it, primarily directly after his bath. It doesn’t matter if he is filled to the brim with organic strained peas, winter squash and pumpkin pie, he wants to be nursed after his bath, and he makes that clear with no uncertain terms.

But, for me, I wonder what if (sniff, sniff) I never have another baby? What if the exquisite experience of having a newborn on our home doesn’t ever happen again? I can honestly say that I’m not too keen on another pregnancy, and while I’m a huge advocate of natural waterbirth at home, and my own experiences were fast, manageable and nothing short of miraculous, I don’t really want to do it again. (Although I would gladly help any other woman who asked for it.) Yes, we could adopt. That is our plan, should we desire a third baby, but the truth is, after Noah, I may never nurse again. Deep sigh. I know a lot of women have struggle upon struggle with nursing and eventually throw in the towel. I understand that, because it isn’t as easy (or painless) as we are told it will be. But when it works, when mommy and baby connect, and baby absolutely loves it, when it is clearly the baby’s favorite activity, a failproof soothing technique, and a moment that brings a smile to his or her little angelic face, ooh, it’s tough to let go. Hmm, I don’t want to be that mom at the park who’s taken it a little too far (the child nurses, then grabs the mom’s car keys and drives to the mall with his friends) but both neither Noah nor I are ready to sever our bond just yet.

Here At Last! June 29, 2007

Welcome to the world, Noah Clayton Lacko.
We are just rounding out Week 1 with our newest family member, and I must share the story of his birth before I over-romanticize it from an overwhelming abundance of love.

No doubt about it, I was fit to be tied. My neighbor, a client of my midwife, had a due date five days later than mine, and delivered her little son before me. I visited mommy and baby, and when I held that sweet little guy, I just began to cry. I’m not sure if it was the hormones, that indescribably wonderful newborn scent, or the longing in my heart for my own son to arrive… it was a potent combo, and may have been just what I needed to go into labor myself.

My husband believes it was our midwife’s urging for us to “get romantic” that did the trick, but as the evening drew to a close, I simply couldn’t get comfortable, and found myself huffing and puffing, and said, almost in disbelief, “I think I’m in labor!” We spent the next hour timing the contractions, and then another 45 minutes later, Noah arrived! It’s a good thing we had planned another home birth. I don’t think I could ever make it to the hospital if I’d wanted.

In the two hours I labored, the months of worry about the health and safe delivery of my baby disappeared. My husband was kind, firm and reassuring. I felt totally freed from any expectations, he just encouraged me to do what I needed to do. With our first child, we had both thought it would be a combined effort, that we would apply all the lessons we’d learned in our Bradley Method classes, and work as a team. My labor had come so fast and furious, and I was so intently focused within, that he had not played the role we’d anticipated. This time, I wanted so much to include him in what can only be described as a journey, the path from full body control to surrender, releasing a child ready for the outside world.

In reality, labor is all-consuming. Having labored both in water and out, I can tell you that a birthing tub relieves at least half the pain, if not more. Pregnant moms, please take my word–even if you don’t plan a water birth, be sure to spend a good percentage of your labor immersed in water. It is so very soothing. Joseph sat and watched, and held me when needed, and I focused on pushing down and out, down and out. He encouraged and cheered me on.

I believe very strongly that inviting each contraction will make the labor go much, much faster, and that it is bearing down against the barrage that causes a prolonged and agonizing labor. It’s the baby’s big day; regardless of the overwhelming waves of pressure, inviting it in, accepting it and breathing with it will bring you to pushing that much faster, and is in agreement with what your child is working inside to accomplish. Speaking as a person who has had 3.5-hour and 2-hour labors, I say accept that your body is working naturally and as intended. Tell yourself, “bring it on! With every new contraction, I’m that much closer to meeting my baby!”

Joseph and the midwives worked to get the birthing tub set up, and I climbed in. I had hoped to deliver in the squatting position, because it stretches the birth canal another 1-1.5 centimeters, but we don’t always get to decide things with birth! I was most comfortable in the least-glamorous position (on hands and knees), but I have no regrets. I actually felt Noah within me, his head and shoulders and body shape, not just a vague, hot pressure. I felt him drop suddenly and pushed. Our midwife and my husband urged me push again because they couldn’t feel the cord (I couldn’t believe that what I’d pushed hadn’t been the whole baby!)

While I wanted to wait for another contraction, I pushed again and suddenly my little newborn son slipped down and forward between my legs and I simply swept him up in my arms and laid easily back in the birth tub. My strong little son put both hands on my chest and pushed himself up and looked me right in the face! I was overcome with emotion and love and snuggled him to me while Joseph came and sat very close next to me and we kissed and met our Noah. All this happened at 11:15 at night, right outside the bedroom of our 2-year-old son, who never even woke up! In fact, my parents had come into town just that afternoon, and even they didn’t wake through the birth! I don’t think I was exactly quiet, but perhaps I wasn’t so loud either?

The beautiful thing about home birth is that once the baby is delivered, you slip directly into your own bed, eat your own food, and your baby is examined when you’re ready to hand him over, and it’s done on your bed right in front of you. Lovely! No hospital gowns, weird hospital smells, fluorescent lights, IVs, unnecessary shots or strangers popping in and out to poke at you or your new baby. That is worth forgoing the epidural alone. Besides, I’ve never met a woman who got one that didn’t experience pain in childbirth anyway. It’s just a fact of life. It’s true that anything worth having is worth working for.

My husband went and woke our toddler and brought him to our bed, and we all snuggled in as a family. He was a little surprised to find a baby there–along with our midwives and the arrival of my best friend Vicki, who had planned to attend the birth.

Later that night, when everything was quiet, I held in my heart some bittersweetness for how little faith I’d had. I’d been so worried about how the delivery would go and had prayed so hard that my baby simply get here in good health. My prayers have always been answered faithfully, so I shouldn’t have put myself–or my family–through such agony! Not only did Noah arrive safely, but it was quick and manageable, he is incredibly healthy and perfectly adorable, the experience instilled an even greater feeling of love and gratitude for my husband, and I didn’t even tear, so the recovery has been (relatively) a breeze! My baby’s birth was a huge gift and a beautiful experience and I feel so lucky and blessed.

Noah Clayton Lacko

April 17, 2007

11:15 pm

8 lbs, 12 oz., 22 inches

So many contractions, so little delivery June 29, 2007

My mistake, in retrospect, was paramount. Based on my past experience (delivering spontaneously, after 3.5 hours of labor at 38 weeks, I decided (yes, decided) I was going to have Baby Noah on Monday, March 25, 2007. I felt complete, ready, and full term.

My husband was as confident as I. He pumped up the water-birthing tub, cleared his schedule and told everyone to expect our little bundle of sweetness. All waited with bated breath.

The day came and went without a flutter.

In fact, three weeks have now passed, and with each midwife visit, I dilate yet another centimeter. I’ve made some (semi-) regular visits to a qualified chiropractor for the Webster technique, I’ve taken walks, I’ve squatted, I’ve Googled the pregnancy salad, eating several at back-to-back meals, and I’ve passed my mucous plug, (oh, joy!) And, I was kept awake half the night last night with 2-minute-long contractions spaced 5 minutes apart. And still, nothing. What gives? I don’t want to be the girl who cried “labor!” but here I am, driving my husband to the edge of expectation and frustration. Each day I feel like it could happen at any time, and yet, my little second son stays put.

Come to think of it, I’ve not-so-subtly accused my husband of losing patience with me, of not being sensitive enough to what I’m going through. However, like his immediate confidence that I’d correctly called my baby’s birth date, his frustration and lack of patience are only a mirror of mine. He’s more in tune with me than I’ve given credit. Must make amends.

I wrote an email to my sister-in-law Michelle (mother of three) pleading for answers. We have a nice comfy crib AND a bassinet AND a vibrating baby lounger for Baby Noah to stretch out in–deluxe accommodations, I promise!–I told her. Truly, it’s gotta be better than hanging upside down in a tight pelvis listening to colonic rumblings, right?

Michelle’s reply: Nope. Not really. Bills are paid. No wet diaps to worry about communicating any desire for a change of in a language that won’t make sense to him for many months. No sibling rivalry. No cold toes, no bug bites, no dietary concerns to have to deal with. Global warming? War in Iraq? Freaky tickle-hyper Elmo dolls? Ha! Who cares?? NO ISSUES!! Obligations? Aside from eventually emerging, nil. Besides, gentle colonic rumblings beat much of the crap (if you will) he’ll have to listen to on The Outside… I’m with Noah. Stay PUT!!!

I have to be honest, I hadn’t looked at it that way. Maybe he’s on to something?

I’m trying each day not to be disappointed. My baby knows the exact time he is supposed to be born. It’s between him and God and not up to me, nor is it up to the Webster technique, or any witchcraft salad (albeit tasty). Honestly, I just need to quit comparing this experience to my first birth and let it be its own thing. I have a lifetime to love my son. Our day will come.

31 Weeks… And Keep Off The Lawn June 29, 2007

Only nine more weeks til Baby Noah arrives! We are very excited as you might imagine. Even better, we are also moving to our new home near the beach on the 15th of February! Packing should certainly be my full-time job right now, but to look around our house, you’d see that we are far from packed. When did we collect so much stuff?

To make matters more difficult, gone are the energetic, easy-going days of the second trimester. I’m getting more useless as the days go on–there are plenty of times when I need to just stop, breathe and rest. I have Braxton-Hicks contractions for longer periods, and I feel like the baby is already taking up my whole abdomen! (And I look like it too.)

People (strangers) don’t help. On a daily basis, I’m approached by, oh, whomever, with comments like, “You’re really small, how far along are you?” (I can’t be that small if they recognize I’m pregnant.) Or, I get, “Oh, are you having twins?” Or, out of nowhere, a hand juts into my path to hover just over my tummy with a whispered, “may I?”

May you what? Feel me up?

I actually really like it when small children want to touch (I imagine it’s good luck), and I do like being greeted by family or close friends with a loving pat on the belly, but when strangers–mostly men, mind you–want a feel, the good luck factor doesn’t exactly come to mind. I try to be gracious and understand that patting a prego is somewhat like stopping to smell the roses. (Although I’m certain my husband feels differently about strange hands in proximity to his wife and unborn child, and who can blame him?) Can you smell the roses without walking on the lawn?

After I gave birth to Joseph, whenever I would see a woman pushing a baby carriage, my perception of this everyday occurrence was hugely altered. What I now saw was a woman pushing the most precious creature that ever graced her (and her partner’s) life; she is pushing her every waking thought and concern, her future, her heart, her great passion, her greatest hope and prayer answered. Bringing that child in to the world either irrevocably altered everything she’d ever held dear, certain and true, or eternally affirmed and cemented her most deeply-held beliefs. And all these overwhelming feelings are lifted yet higher still when shared with the person she chose to spend her life with. Birth is the most wonderful miracle of love, and when we’ve pushed our own carriage, we’re all too aware of the immense value of what lies within those soft blankets, or below that burgeoning maternity blouse.

Anyway, I must get packing. If you are pregnant, please give that gorgeous belly of yours a rub for me, and for the rose-smellers.

We’re Pregnant! June 29, 2007

We’re only 8 weeks along–so early to be heralding the news!–but we’re overjoyed to announce that yes, we’re having our second. Very exciting!
Our midwife suggested using Red Clover Flower supplements, and I think that made all the difference in our conception. It happened so rapidly! So fast, in fact, that we find ourselves faced with the arrival of a little Aries. It struck me that I’ve only ever known one Aries in my whole life. I went in search of clues into the future characteristics of the Littlest Lacko. Yes, I know, what can the zodiac REALLY tell me about my baby–but like most expecting parents, I’m already anxious to learn whatever I can about my new child, and I’ll take what I can get!

Looks like I’m in for a handful. I found the following on www.danitrue.com:

“This energetic child will walk and run as soon as possible and perform daring feats of exploration. Many children born under this sign appear hyperactive and easily frustrated when they cannot get their own way. Since they are always in a rush to get on with life, they are prone to violent temper tantrums and dramatic physical displays. Nevertheless, the natural enterprise and curiosity of the Aries child does need to be encouraged and it is important to place as few restrictions on this little one as possible. Persuade the little Aries to take up a hobby which requires the development of patience, for those born under this Sign are the least patient of the Zodiac and will need such self-control later in life.
The Aries child loves to take things apart and may break toys easily. With encouragement, however, he or she will develop formidable coordination. The bossy tendencies of this little one should be molded into leadership qualities rather than allowed to become bullying in nature. Otherwise, the “me first” Aries will have many clashes with other strong-willed youngsters. The key emphasis should be on helping this child to control his or her temper and develop self-discipline and respect for authority. It is also important to emphasize good manners and consideration for others in order to help the willful little Aries to get along socially with playmates. Aries children should be persuaded to take out their aggressions and frustrations in active, competitive sports. Indeed, this is where they usually excel.
Stimulation and a sense of achievement are vital to this child. Without these two things, this little one can easily turn into an extremely difficult child to live with. Blessed with deep resources of determination, the Aries child is able to face any challenge, but does tend to act before thinking. There may also be a tendency to make loud and/or unkind remarks about a playmate. Unfortunately, the Aries child will rarely consider such behavior to be selfish, perceiving this as nothing more than an assertive right to do and say as he or she pleases. Blessed with a retentive memory and quick flow of thought (to say nothing of the abundant ambition inherent in this sign), the Aries child normally excels in scholastics. However, this little one is high-strung and will expend much energy in trying to accomplish too many things at the same time. Restless and inquisitive, the Aries child is seldom content with any one thing for a great length of time. As the Aries child grows to be a teenager, the competitive side of his or her nature will gradually become increasingly apparent.”
Scared, yet? (Please write if all this is malarkey and you have a little Aries darling!) BTW, I have a certain intuition that my little raspberry is, in fact, a girl. So, I continue with the following, from the same site:“The Aries girl will be full of verve and something of a live wire. With an abundance of energy to burn, she tends to attract many admirers. There is a fiercely independent streak here and any girl governed by this Sign will chart her own course. It would not be unusual to find the Aries girl adopting a leadership role at school and, since this Zodiac Sign rules the head and face, she will always be extremely particular about her make-up. This is a hyperactive youngster…forever rushing from one activity to the next…and given this girl’s energy, she is likely to be actively involved in sports, usually of the physically demanding type. Aries girls are self-sufficient and pursue what they want with much willpower and determination. This girl will “think big” and is likely to attend academic institutions which are the most beneficial on a personal level. In short, this is an achiever who is definitely ‘going places.’”Pretty exciting! I have a lot to look forward. OK, even more indulgent, I’m including a (long) list of famous Arians, mostly as a snapshot of the Aries personality (I love the idea of Gloria Steinem, but I cringe at the inclusion of Adolf Hitler–eek):

Johann Sebastian Bach, Matthew Broderick, Gary Oldman, William Shatner, Elvis Stojko, Andrew Lloyd Webber, Reese Witherspoon, Joan Crawford, Harry Houdini, Steve McQueen,
Howard Cosell, Aretha Franklin, Elton John, Sarah Jessica Parker, Gloria Steinem, Arturo Toscanini, James Caan, Robert Frost, Leonard Nimoy, Sandra Day O’Connor, Diana Ross, Martin Short, Steven Tyler, Tennessee Williams, Mariah Carey, Quentin Tarantino, Sarah Vaughan, August Anheuser Busch, Jr., Ken Howard, Reba McEntire, Julia Stiles, Theresa of Avila, Lucy Lawless, Elle Macpherson, Oscar Mayer, Warren Beatty, Eric Clapton, Celine Dion, M.C. Hammer, Paul Reiser, Vincent Van Gogh, Herb Alpert, Richard Chamberlain, Rene Descartes, Al Gore, Franz Joseph Haydn, Jack Johnson, Shirley Jones, Ewan McGregor, Christopher Walken, Otto von Bismarck, Ali MacGraw, Debbie Reynolds, Hans Christian Anderson, Marvin Gaye, Alec Sergei Rachmaninoff, Alec Baldwin, Marlon Brando, Doris Day, Jennie Garth, Jane Goodall, Eddie Murphy, Wayne Newton, David Hyde Pierce, Robert Downey, Jr., Heath Ledger, Arthur Murray, Craig T. Nelson, Bette Davis, Gregory Peck, Colin Powell, Spencer Tracy, Andre Previn, Jackie Chan, Francis Ford Coppola, Russell Crowe, James Garner, Billie “Lady Day” Holiday, Ravi Shankar, William Wordsworth, Patricia Arquette, Gautama Buddha, Betty Ford, Mary Pickford, W.C. Fields, Hugh Hefner, Paulina Porizkova, Dennis Quaid, John Madden, Mandy Moore, Joseph Pulitzer, Steven Seagal, Omar Shar, Oleg Cassini, Ethel Kennedy, Maria Callas, Tom Clancy, Claire Danes, Shannen Doherty, Andy Garcia, Vince Gill, Herbie Hancock, David Letterman, Samuel Beckett, Catherine de’ Medici, Al Green, Thomas Jefferson, Rick Schroder, Sarah Michelle Gellar, John Gielgud, Loretta Lynn, Pete Rose, Henry James, Emma Thompson, Leonardo da Vinci, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Charlie Chaplin, Martin Lawrence, Enrico “Henry” Mancini, Peter Ustinov, Wilbur Wright, Nikita Khrushche,v Conan O’Brien, Christian Slater, James Woods, Hayden Christensen, Kate Hudson, Ashley Judd, Jayne Mansfield, Dudley Moore, Eliot Ness, Paloma Picasso, Al Unser, Jr., Carmen Electra, Adolf Hitler, Jessica Lange, Napoleon III, Saint Rose of Lima.